Honest Friends and New Cloths!

Isn’t honesty one of the most treasured qualities in a person’s character? I find myself gravitating to really honest people. They have this ability to speak the truth even when they know I won’t like what they say.

I like to be honest with my friends, family and workmates. Sometimes I ask those with whom I am involved with in a project, situation or effort if they want to hear what I have to say about a question or problem we are working on. They say, “Be honest" so I do and most often it turns out well, mostly.

The easy route is making a safe controlled answer akin perhaps to pretending a baby whose diaper needs to be changed really doesn’t smell. We all know something needs to be changed here and the question is who is going to do it? Pass that baby around!

      Doesn’t honesty makes us better people. Lack of honesty hurts people subtly and often severely.

My friend Aaron is one of those loving honest people. After a meeting one day where a lot of good ideas were exchanged with healthy, even heated, pushback Aaron challenged me with some constructive honesty:

He said, “You always apologize to the group after you talk and you say, ‘I’m not that smart.' I think you should stop doing that, just say what is on your mind, it matters.”

Hearing his loving correction was like a searchlight on the self-effacing mask I often wear in public. Ouch, he found me!  I was reflecting a lack of confidence. “I’m not that smart” is a disclaimer saying, “…if you don’t like my offering please disregard it and don’t dislike me.”

From that point on I exchanged the need for confidence and simply exercised my competence. As Canadian jockey Red Pollard said in the epic movie Seabiscuit, “I got better. He made me better. Hell, you made me better.”

                 Honesty makes us better people.  Honest friends are treasures from heaven.

Is there somebody in your life that will be honest with you? Do you have a desire for honest input? Do you remember the short tale by Hans Christian Anderson about the Emperors new cloths?

That little boy in the story spoke honestly when the appeasing crowd just played it safe, watching the naked Emperor stroll by au naturel! It made headlines in the  Kingdom Chronicles the next morning!

Loving honesty is rare and when I find a friend who has it and will offer it to me, I want to keep them as friends for life and value their gift of truth saying! Thanks Aaron for being THAT guy!